Restless in Champaign

I haven't written in a while. Not necessarily because there hasn't been a lot going on but because there has been a lot going on -- mostly internally. I'm hitting another snag or phase of this whole process and I don't know how to read it yet. I'm either getting ready to make a good step forward or I'm getting ready to take a few steps back. That seems to be how things go. So far, the trend has ultimately been in a positive direction but when I'm in the middle of these shifts, it feels like I imagine earthquake survivors would feel. Like you never know when another tremor might hit. The worst might be over. Then again...

We had our huge garage sale last weekend. I loved it and hated it. It was so interesting to see the people and interact with them. One guy had a HUGE tattoo all over the back of his shaved head and tattoos in lots of other places with a leather Harley vest on. He was quite nice and pleasant. I told him I really liked his tattoo. And I did! One mother and daughter had the cutest white fluffy baby puppy with them and let me hold her while they shopped. I didn't want to let her go. Some people haggled the price down ridiculously and others obligingly paid the price as marked. 

I can't say that I was seriously attached to most of the stuff we sold. It was just stuff. You would be surprised at how popular ice cube trays are at garage sales. Since our fridge didn't have an ice maker, I was always in search of the perfect ice cube tray -- one that didn't spill when I carried it to the freezer and that popped out easily. So I'm a weirdo about some things. I never really found one that I loved. 

I sold a bunch of my art supplies and that made me kind of sad. More because I hadn't done more with them than anything. All replaceable. Mostly, it felt good to know that things would be re-used at a price that was affordable for most people. One woman bought all the polymer clay and clay tools I had for her elementary school classroom. I know teachers often have to buy many of their own supplies and she said that since the art programs have been cut so much she tries to provide some art in her classes. I felt really happy that some little kids somewhere would be having fun with clay that they might not otherwise have gotten. 

I was surprised about how many books people bought. I liked that especially. We still have a lot left and have to decide whether to donate them to books for prisoners or to the public library. For some reason, I really like donating books. I hope people enjoy them and get something from them. One woman bought a bunch of the spiritual books I've collected over the years and said "You must be a very calm, centered person." I said, "Yes, my child." :-) No, actually, I said, "If I were so calm and centered, I wouldn't have needed the books!" I hope she finds some peace in them. Another man must have spent an hour looking through all our books and picked out a whole huge box of them. He was into history. If anyone wants me to send a surprise set of books I think you might like, just let me know!

Since the sale, I've been sad and in a funk. There's a lot to do to get ready to move all the stuff out of the house to Geoff's new house and then I'm moving again in mid-July. The house closing is on June 18th and Geoff's on a business trip in Canada so I'm helping him arrange for movers. I remember the day we closed on the house. We got Italian food and went to eat it sitting on the floor in our new empty house. I just never would have expected to be moving out of it this way almost 10 years later. Surreal. I wonder if I'll be saying the same thing about whatever's happening 10 years from now. You never know what's gonna happen...